4 Tips For Effective Co-Parenting After A Divorce
A divorce can be incredibly difficult for the whole family, not just the spouses involved. Whether the split from your spouse is civil or acrimonious, it is essential for the two of you to learn how to effectively co-parent for the sake of your children. If you're getting divorced, use the following types to help ensure that you and your ex can share custody in a way that is healthy for the kids:
Arrange Custody and Visitation Schedules through the Court
It is a smart idea for all parents to arrange custody and visitation through the court system, even if a divorce is amicable. When this step is taken through the legal system it is binding, which can help prevent future fights or disagreements about holidays and vacations. When you have a legal custody and visitation agreement, neither parent can make changes without permission. Changing a visitation schedule or custody arrangement involves returning to court and having it approved by a family court judge.
Communicate Effectively
While your marriage may have ended, you and your ex spouse will need to be able to communicate effectively on a regular basis until the children you share are no longer minors. Electronic communication, such as email or text messaging, can work very well as a medium for divorced parents to discuss issues pertaining to their children. No matter what issue arises, never use any of your children to act as a messenger between you and your ex, as this can be very stressful for a child as well as psychologically damaging.
Work Together to Create a Co-Parenting Plan
No matter how you and your ex-spouse feel about each other, both of you probably want what is best for your kids. A co-parenting plan can ensure that you and your ex are on the same page about things like rules, expectations, how to handle the kids' birthdays, and where to pick up kids on transition days.Creating a co-parenting plan can help reduce potential stress and bitterness in the future and allow both you and your ex to parent the children in a way you both agree on.
Consider Family Counseling
In some cases, there is a lot of anger between spouses which can prevent them from working together to co-parent well. If you and your ex have this type of relationship, visiting a family counselor can be very beneficial for your kids in the long run. A good family counselor can assist both of you in putting aside any anger and bitterness so you can co-parent peacefully and raise happy, well-adjusted children.
